Save My Dreams

myranda kasachkoff . twenty one . texas . married . army wife . mommy to be :)

primadonnas:

SO I GET HOME AND THERE’S THIS RANDOM KID ON MY COUCH AND HE’S LIKE ‘ALRIGHT MAN I DON’T WANNA HURT U JUST PUT UR STUFF DOWN AND GET ON THE GROUND I JUST WANT UR MONEY’ AND I FUCKIN ALMOST PUKED I WAS LIKE “OMG PLS NO I DON’T HAVE ANY MONEY I’M ONLY 15” THEN HE WAS LIKE “NAH MAN I’M JUST FUCKIN WITH U I’M UR BROTHER’S FRIEND HE’S IN THE SHOWER I’M JUST WAITIN FOR HIM”

(via liightup)

idaresayihavetoomany:

its-always-funnier-in-enochian:

timelord-castiel:

rosskemp:

do i have cramps or has my appendix exploded

does my boob hurt or am i having a heart attack

am i on my period or do i have internal bleeding

these are our struggles

Thinking of dirty thoughts and getting an erection in awkward situations

The struggles of a man

boo hoo

thinking of my naked grandma isnt going to suck the blood back into my vagina

you need an award right now

(Source: kul5ara, via liightup)

mostly10:

porrn:

Is it just me or you don’t really realise how drunk you are until you are in a bathroom alone???

image

(via liightup)

holy-time-lord-of-gallifrey:

Drake and Josh shaped our generation like I’m 99.99% sure that this show is the reason I’m so sarcastic.

(via flowerbombaffliction)

necesitamos:

FRIENDLY REMINDER THAT you are allowed to feel proud of yourself for things that might seem silly to other people, like getting better at a video game or putting together a nice outfit for the next morning or finishing a book. You deserve to feel proud for your accomplishment.

(Source: meowstically, via thehoursgettinglate)