i bet in 2000 years theyre gonna be digging up the rubble of our destroyed earth and they’ll find a nokia still on half battery
Next time a blocked number calls you answer like this: “Jim’s whore house. You got the dough, we got the hoe.”
Why does this not have any notes?
lol no “Nashville sperm bank, you squeeze it we freeze it. how may I help you?”
“Henderson’s Morgue, you stab em, we slab em, this is Eight Ball speaking.”
“Texas crematorium you kill ‘em we grill ‘em how can I direct your call?”
when i was in 7th grade, i had a science teacher who would give really easy tests. i would finish them in 10 minutes, then spend the rest of the period drawing ninjas all over the paper. i always told him to circle all 200 in red pen, and he did. one day, i decided to fuck him over by only drawing 199. when i got the test back, he’d written “you devil-spawn” on the top.